One of my favourite things about the HBO series, Insecure, is Issa’s mirror moments. The lead character, Issa, (played by the phenomenal actress and writer, Issa Rae) usually steals a moment to talk to her mirror-self. The character always sees another side of herself in the mirror and engages her mirror-self in a conversation, scratch that, in a freestyle rap battle. Many times, the mirror-self acts as the protagonist of the scene.
We all have mirror-selves, whether we choose to engage the mirror self is a different conversation. The mirror-self, many times, can show up as a critic or cheerleader.
We all have an inner critic: the one that says we are not good enough, the one that fuels our self-doubt, the one that makes us second-guess ourselves even when we are on track, the one that curses us out and amplifies the noise from the outside world (think – beauty standards).
Inner Hype Person
On the flip side, this is our inner cheerleader or hype person; the one that tells us we are good enough. That we are beautiful regardless of external beauty standards. The one that steadily roots for us.
Speak to Yourself
We deserve to speak to ourselves with love, but, let’s be frank, this is easier said than done, especially when our brains are wired to focus on the negative. The good news is that we can start changing that by the way we talk to ourselves. The way we talk to ourselves boosts our confidence.
I talk to myself a lot. I spent part of the Christmas holiday with family and friends. I remember my friend saying that I announce everything to myself when I said, “It is time for rest, it is time to sleep.” I told him I talk to myself a lot. I walk around my house chatting away. I do this because it helps me sort through my thoughts.
Research shows that talking to yourself out loud helps you find focus, it is motivating and warns off self-criticism. Think about it – we have roughly 50,000 thoughts per day with a fair share of negative ones. We are only humans, after all.
Amplify your Inner Cheerleader
I invite you to give your inner cheerleader a voice and make those supportive thoughts even more powerful. Let’s say our positive and affirmative thoughts out loud. You can decide to make supporting yourself one of your daily rituals.
Below is the practice card (a tool) I created that can help you activate this new ritual.
I hope you’ll feel good when you share those supportive words with yourself. If you love journaling, you can write these words and read them to yourself every day.
You can be your greatest cheerleader if you set your mind to. That inner voice is always inside you, now amplify the heck out of it!
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